PERFECTIONISM BLOCKING YOUR PASSION?
Mary Lyn Miller
late in sending the PEP TALK Newsletter to you, and there's a
reason why. I am a barely recovering perfectionist.
that's it. Right now I am trying to learn more about having an
HTML template set up so all my communications to you have pictures
and graphics and looks fabulous, but I don't know anything about
that, yet I wanted it to be just right and beautiful before I
sent you anything. I want you to just LOVE this issue of PEP TALK.
But, I don't know exactly what to ask people who help me, they
are incredibly busy anyway, I'm not too certain what to do, so
the result is that I just haven't done anything.
I'm taking this time - in a text format - nothing pretty or dynamic
or trail blazing - to confess to you the error of my ways because
I realized that communicating with you - in any way at al right
now - imperfectly - is actually the most important thing.
it occurred to me that this may be happening to you.
are you waiting for? Are you waiting for the sun, moon and stars
to be in perfect alignment before you take a step to do something
that you would love to do? Are you "waiting" to be in
better off financially before you take a risk, hoping by the time
the kids are more grown or you're retired, you will have figured
out what to do with your life? Or maybe you'd like to dance or
sing or draw a picture but you don't know how YET, so you don't
do anything about it. After all, you might be bad at it - you
will be - all beginners are. Perfectionists don't allow for "Learning
Curves." We think it should be perfect the first time we
try - we get upset because others who have more experience and
have worked harder - look better. (See below for the Perfectionist
of anything at all that you MIGHT enjoy, that might give you more
passion. Got it?? Hold it in your mind's eye. Then, ask yourself
why you're not doing something about it.....NOW!.
the self-discovery process of uncovering Deborah's Core Essence,
she talked to me about her love of water - "swimming, windsurfing,
boating - all of it," she said. I asked if she was doing
any of those activities in her life, and this banker-Mom had to
admit she hadn't done it in years. Only 3 weeks later she came
back, filled with enthusiasm and passion. She had done many things
I had suggested, but she was extremely animated when it came to
her newly attended water aerobics class. "I have this gym
membership with a pool and thought what the heck, I'll give it
a try. I did the class and then did laps after. It was exhilarating.
I wasn't perfect, but I came out literally bursting with joy."
is an addiction to lack. Think about it: the perfectionist is
always focused on where there could be more. The more balanced
person can appreciate the progress that has been made, no matter
how miniscule. The perfectionist, on the other hand, is always
focused on how much more could have been done, how much more there
is to do ie: the empty space. Since the basic law of the Universe
is what you focus on expands, when you are focused on lack, it
will keep replicating in your life.
words of wisdom: "Anything worth doing is worth doing badly."